


Aftermath

by LovelyInspiration



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Complicated Relationships, Dark Past, Dialogue Heavy, Enemies to Friends, Feels, Friends to Enemies, Gen, Heroes to Villains, Hurt/Comfort, Love/Hate, My First AO3 Post, Not Julian Albert Friendly, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Redemption, Some Humor, Team Dynamics, Villains to Heroes, enemies to friends to ???
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-07
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:47:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23057215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LovelyInspiration/pseuds/LovelyInspiration
Summary: Iris is safe. Cisco is back. Savitar is accepting help. Caitlin – or, Killer Frost – is... well, she's complicated. Overall, things seem to be looking up for Team Flash. However, with two ex-villains now hanging around STAR Labs, it's clear that not all has been said and done.
Relationships: Barry Allen/Iris West, Killer Frost/Savitar, Savitar/Caitlin Snow
Comments: 3
Kudos: 32





	1. Dr. Jekyll & Mrs. Hyde

**Author's Note:**

> I began planning for this story back when Season 3 was still airing and am just now getting around to posting it. The Savitar/Killer Frost dynamic was just so intriguing to me. I wish they'd done more with it, so I wrote my own story to fill the void. I know I'm several years late to the Season-Three-rewrites-party, but this idea has stuck with me for so long. I finally decided to stop overthinking everything and just put it out there. Also, quick side-note: this story IS NOT Julian-friendly. I had many issues with his character that will be brought up in this story. If you're a Julian fan, I'd turn back now. There's also some WestAllen in here, but it's far from the focal point. I think this story will satisfy both WestAllen and SnowBarry fans in their own ways.
> 
> Anyway, that's all I've got to say. Enjoy!

He didn't even have to look up to know she was watching him. The sudden chill in the air gave her away.

"If you're gonna stand there all creepy, why don't you do it where I can see you?"

Killer Frost slid out of the shadows. She confidently strode toward Cisco's work table, curtly asking, "Are you finished yet?"

"Yeah well, if I was, I wouldn't be so quick to tell you," he replied, looking up from the Speed Force Bazooka. "What, you don't think I don't know that I'm dead the second I finish this?"

She began to circle him, like a lion stalking its prey. "You know, there's a way you can save yourself."

"How do I save myself, pray tell?" Cisco asked dryly. He never ceased to interject some sarcasm, even in the direst of situations. Iris has made many disapproving remarks about his sardonic sense of humor.

"By joining us," she said, not missing a beat.

"Wow – I suppose this is the part where I join the dark side, then?"

"Come on. Savitar, Killer Frost, and Reverb – you remember what Reverb told you on Earth Two. You have the power to become a _god_."

"Is that what Savitar promised you?"

Killer Frost casually leaned against the table, as if she were talking to an old friend instead of her captive. Cisco felt a pang in his chest at how familiar the gesture was. "You have so much potential. And trust me, it's so much more fun to be bad."

"I know you don't really think that." Cisco took a brief pause, choosing his next words carefully. He wasn't sure whether sharing this information would make things worse or better. Either way, he supposed, she had a right to know. "Julian went to Tannhauser to work on a cure – with your mother. He figured it out."

The cocky look on her faced dropped in an instant. She removed her elbows from the table, straightening her back. "You're lying."

"Your BFF just told me so."

Killer Frost briefly bowed her head, unable to maintain Cisco's piercing eye contact. He had no idea what she was thinking, but the fact that he got her thinking at all was a victory in itself. Perhaps this was the chance he needed to break through to her.

Cisco took a step closer. "It doesn't have to be like this. We can fix you." Killer Frost then restored eye contact, so he was encouraged to add, "Come back to us."

Once he said that, the skepticism on her face abated. Her icy-white iris's flared in anger. "Fix this," she spat, "Or I'll show you who I truly am."

Killer Frost gave him one last chilling stare before striding away. She had almost exited the room when a familiar _whoosh_ stopped her in her tracks.

"How did it go?" she asked, turning around to face whom she thought would be Savitar. Instead, Killer Frost was met with the faces of Barry and Wally. Instinctively, her hands flew up, frost appearing from her palms. "What do you two think you're doing here?"

Barry's hands rose as well – but in a sign of surrender. "Hey, there's no need for that. We're not here to fight. We came to bring you home." He glanced over at Cisco and smiled. " _Both_ of you."

Cisco smiled back, relief clear in his voice. "Man, am I glad to see you guys."

"Are you insane? He's not going anywhere," Killer Frost sneered. "And you two are gonna have to go through me before you can even hope to walk back out." One of her arms pulled back, getting ready to fire.

Barry stretched his arms out even further, emphasizing his gesture of peace. "Caitlin, wait! You don't have the full story. Savitar – he..." He floundered for the right words, eventually turning to his protégé for help. Kid Flash just gave him a skeptical shrug. Barry sighed, relenting to telling the straightforward truth, "We met up earlier, and I convinced him to come back to STAR Labs. The Team is trying to find a way to keep him from, you know..."

Wally made a _boom_ sound with him mouth and used his hands to mimic an explosion. Cisco tried to hide a snicker.

Killer Frost looked surprised for a moment, but it soon faded into distrust. "You never were a good liar, _Flash_. The last thing Savitar would do is turn to you guys."

"Caitlin, I promise, this isn't a trick-"

The frost at her fingertips accelerated. "Stop calling me 'Caitlin'! That is _not_ my name."

Barry swallowed hard. He took a cautious step forward, as if approaching a wild animal. There really wasn't much difference, after all. "I'm not calling you 'Killer Frost'. I know you; you're no killer."

"Come any closer and we'll find out."

"Come on, Caitlin. We wouldn't have even known where to find you if Savitar hadn't told us," Wally finally spoke up.

That statement seemed to make her stop and think. Barry seized the opportunity, speaking again, "He's agreed to accept our help. We can help you, too. At least come back to STAR Labs – then you can talk to Savitar yourself. And if you choose not to stay, we won't stop you."

Killer Frost looked right into Barry's eyes, searching for deceit. After a minute, her own eyes narrowed. "Fine, I'll go. But if this turns out to be a trick, you _will_ regret it."

Barry nodded. He quickly directed Wally to take Cisco, while he took hold of Frost's arm. She flinched under his touch but didn't pull away. The next thing she knew, Barry took off, racing her though the city.

* * *

The Cortex was quiet when they arrived. The atmosphere reeked of exhaustion and grief; she could practically smell it in the air. Those were feelings so well known by Team Flash. Frost remembered many occasions where she, herself, was too distraught to even move. It was almost nostalgic. She was so well-acquainted with sorrow, so accustomed to the emotion that it was almost a comfort being in the midst of it again. She never imagined that she'd be the one to create it, though.

Barry halted to a stop in the middle of the room, and Killer Frost quickly yanked out of his grasp.

Almost immediately, she heard a British voice behind her call, "Caitlin!" Killer Frost turned around to face Julian. His expression was one of pure, unfiltered relief. Julian smiled at her like she was the answer to all his prayers. "Thank goodness you're okay."

No such joy was found in her. Julian was the last of her concerns right now. She ignored his comments and instead faced Barry to ask, "Where's Savitar?"

He pointed over her shoulder. "Med bay."

Killer Frost stalked away, ignoring the feeling of Julian's eyes burning into her back. She entered the med bay and looked around to locate the self-proclaimed God of Speed. True to Barry's word, Savitar was sitting there at one of the desks. Her blood ran that much colder seeing him here. A part of her had hoped that this _was_ a trick. At least then, he wouldn't have been abandoning their plan without so much as a word to her.

"Mind explaining to me what's going on?" she demanded, skipping the greetings.

He swiveled around in the chair to face her. "Good – you're here. I should tell you there's been a change in plans."

"Oh, now all of a sudden you want to keep me informed? I already figured that out when Barry and Wally came bursting into the warehouse."

"So, you _don't_ need an explanation, then?"

Killer Frost decided to ignore his blatant sarcasm. She was in no mood for his smart-aleck mouth. "Why would you tell them where Cisco was? He had almost finished the Speed Force Bazooka."

"I may not need it anymore."

She scoffed. "What would make you say that?"

"I'm sure Barry told you. They're going to fix my problem for me."

Killer Frost paused, somewhat taken aback by his response. Her tone was disparaging when she finally spat out, "And you believed him?"

Savitar looked down at his fingernails, sighing. "It's complicated, alright?"

"I'll bet it is. Savitar, we _already_ have a plan to keep you in existence. Not only that, but to make you a _god._ Why are you throwing that away – especially for _Team Flash_ , of all people?" She spat out the words "Team Flash" like poison.

Killer Frost would be lying if she said her anger was directed solely at Team Flash, though. She was also quite offended that Savitar seemed to have lost faith in their plan – or, even more offensive, lost faith in _her_. Did he not believe that she could fulfill her end of the bargain? Did he think her to be weak? There had to be some explanation for his sudden turn around. Team Flash must've been an excuse. Surely he didn't _trust_ them. Killer Frost had spent way too many an hour listening to him vent about how cruel Future-Team Flash had been.

It made her blood boil just thinking about it. She had stood by Savitar, even after their initial plan went awry. He had been beaten, neglected, rejected, but she was still willing to work with him. Savitar wasn't very trustworthy, but he wore the face of someone she'd once trusted, so that had been enough for her. And most importantly, she accepted him – something that Team Flash certainly hadn't done.

Despite all that, this was how he repaid her loyalty? By ditching her?

"It's better this way."

The small flurry of anger in her stomach turned into a full-blown snowstorm. "For who, Savitar? It certainly doesn't benefit me, so are you just thinking about yourself?"

Savitar glanced up at her, silent. His eyes were dull and emotionless, but she knew better.

Frost shook her head slowly, giving him a nasty look. "So that's how it is? You get a better opportunity, an easier way out, and you just bail on all our hard work?"

"I don't have to justify my decisions to you."

"Unbelievable. How very _Barry Allen_ of you. Once again, you couldn't care less what happens to everyone else as long as you get _your_ happy ending."

"You call this a happy ending? I spent decades perfecting this plan! For so long, I had a guaranteed win. In the future, I _was_ a god. Then that drumstick-carrying buffoon ruined everything!"

"Oh, cry me a river! We both know why you did this. You've spent so much time trying to prove how opposite you are from the Flash, but you're more selfish than Barry ever was."

If she hadn't been so angry in that moment, perhaps Killer Frost would've noticed the thinly-vailed pain in his eyes. It was a low blow, comparing him to Barry – and she knew it.

The pain wasn't there for long, though. It disappeared in an instant, replaced with his usual hateful expression. "And what is it that I'm so selfishly keeping you from? Huh? What do you want from me?"

"You weren't the only one who gained something from this, Savitar. I had stakes in this plan, too! What makes you think I don't still want to rule this city?"

The closest thing to a chuckle escaped his mouth. "You think you could accomplish that alone? Fine! Have at it! No one ever said you had to stay here. If you think you can do better, _go_. I'm not stopping you. I made my decision, and you are more than welcome to make a different one."

"I don't need your _permission_ , Savitar. You are not my _boss_. We were _partners_. Partners decide things _together_. Partners look out for each other."

"Well, I don't know what to tell you. Partnerships end, alright?"

Hearing him say that bothered her in a way she couldn't explain. Her hands were beginning to shake after all that yelling, but she refused to let it seep into her voice. "Fine. If that's how you feel, maybe I will go off on my own."

She turned and marched out of the room, not giving him a chance to retort.

* * *

Team Flash stood around the winding desk in the Cortex, secretly eavesdropping on to the fight going on in the Med Bay. However, their entertainment was cut short when the commotion suddenly stopped. Killer Frost came out soon afterward, walking right past them wordlessly. She brushed past Iris and Joe, who happened to be entering the Cortex as she was leaving.

Joe looked back at her retreating form. "What happened?"

"Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Hyde just had a domestic," Cisco commented.

Wally chuckled from where he sat at the desk. Iris, however, sent Cisco a disapproving glare.

"This is no time for jokes, Cisco," she said.

"A: that wasn't a joke. B: I just spent the better part of the night being the assistant to Frankenstein. Let me have this."

Iris rolled her eyes. Joe decided to step in, saying, "We're not just going to let her walk out again, are we?"

Cisco looked out into the hallway, letting it sink in that Killer Frost had just stormed off. A bit of anxiety developed in the pit of his stomach. Joe was right; they couldn't afford to lose her again. This was, perhaps, his last chance to get his friend back.

With a nod, Cisco said, "Leave it to me," and jogged off after her.

Once he was caught up to her, he slowed down to match her pace.

She glanced his way but didn't falter in her stride. "Oh, wow. Is the great Cisco Ramon about to grace me with one of Team Flash's famous 'hallway heart-to-hearts'?" Every word dripped with sarcasm.

"Hey! I'll have you know, my pep-talk game is very strong." Killer Frost just gave him another sidelong glare, but he could tell she was amused. Softening his tone, he asked, "But, for real, are you alright? That fight sounded intense."

"What do you care?"

"What do you mean, 'what do I care'? I care _about you_ , Caitlin."

She scoffed. "Yeah, right."

"It's true. Come on, Cait, we've known each other for years. You know I'm always gonna look out for you."

"For the last time, _stop_ calling me Caitlin! I'm not Caitlin! Quit pretending like you're so worried about me. I can watch out for myself."

Cisco stopped, grabbing hold of her arm. She stopped also, if not just to yank her arm away. "Is that what you think – that I only care about you when you're Caitlin?"

"Don't play dumb, Cisco. All the offers you've made to 'help me', to 'cure me', to ' _fix_ me' - it's clear you only want Caitlin."

"What? No! That's not why I said those things. I said that because I know how afraid Caitlin was of you, of _becoming you_. And I don't believe that you're happy like this, either. I just wanted you to know that you have options. Working with Savitar wasn't the only way to go."

She chuckled humorlessly. "Yeah, well, it certainly isn't an option anymore."

"There is still another one."

Killer Frost looked at Cisco skeptically.

"The cure," he elaborated. "Savitar wasn't lying. Julian told me himself that he worked out a remedy. It's yours, if you want it."

"What makes you think I’m not happy like this?" she asked defensively.

" _Are you_ happy like that?"

"Contrary to popular believe, Cisco, my life is not all that bad."

"That didn't answer my question."

Killer Frost huffed, looking away in frustration.

"Look, I just don't want you to settle because you don't think there's a way out. We have a cure, Frost – a legitimate cure. You can have your old life back."

"Assuming that the cure actually works."

"You'll never know unless you try."

Killer Frost paused for a long moment. The fact that she was considering this at all surprised even her. Most days, she would've scoffed or cringed at the thought of being Caitlin again. Even now, it seemed a bit unsettling. She'd been fighting for control for so long. Would she really be willing to give it all away in an instant? Was she better off as Caitlin Snow? Being Killer Frost certainly had some perks. She was more confident, more composed, more powerful. As of right now, however, she was also more alone.

The threat she made a minute ago about going out on her own held little-to-no weight. Even Killer Frost recognized that. By nature, she was a social person. She'd worked in groups all her life. From her high school newspaper to her job at STAR Labs to her position on Team Flash, she always worked with others. Now that her partnership with Savitar was over, though, she felt quite directionless. Caitlin never thought anything worth doing unless she was doing it with others. Unfortunately, Killer Frost inherited that sentiment. She simply didn't know how to function 100% on her own. All her life, she had never had to.

That said, maybe she would've been better off as Caitlin. At least Caitlin would be happy to reunite with her team. After all, Killer Frost no longer had anything to strive for. Her alter ego still had a chance, though – a chance to be part of a group again.

There was one thought that still nagged her, though. Even if she did take the cure, there was no guarantee that Caitlin Snow's life would be exactly the same. After all the time she's spent in control, after all she's done, Killer Frost doubted that her alter ego would return unscathed. At this point, too much had happened. The girl that Team Flash so desperately wanted back just might not be the same anymore. 

"Cisco, you do understand that even _if_ Caitlin returns, that doesn't mean that my life will go back to normal – right?"

Cisco was quiet for a moment, contemplating her words. Killer Frost bit her bottom lip in anticipation. Finally, Cisco replied, "Yeah, I understand that. It doesn't matter, though. All I want is for you to be as happy as possible. If that's as Frost, then so be it. But if it's as Caitlin, then I hope you'll give it a chance. Whoever she is now, whoever _you_ are now, I'd welcome her any way – as long as she's happy."

Now it was her turn to think quietly. Killer Frost couldn't help the relief she felt at Cisco's words. If Team Flash truly was willing to give her another chance, maybe she could meet them half way. Maybe. There was still a lot to consider. After all, Caitlin had never done anything for her, so why should she help her? She didn’t owe Caitlin anything.

With a long sigh, she finally relented. "I'll think about it."

Cisco's expression lightened, his eyes filling with hope. "That's all I'm asking."

He removed a vial full of blue liquid from his pocket and offered it to her. She glanced at it, then shook her head. Cisco's eyebrows fell in confusion, but he pocketed the cure anyway. While he did that, Killer Frost began walking away again.

"Hey, where are you going?" Cisco called after her.

"Home," she answered simply, pressing the button for the elevator. "I told you: I need time to think."

"You're more than welcome to stay here, you know."

Killer Frost stepped through the opening doors. "Don't worry your pretty little head, Cisco. I won't go out and start another Ice Age or anything."

Cisco chuckled. "That's not why I was offering."

"No, of course not," she replied sarcastically.

The elevator doors closed, leaving Cisco alone in the corridor. In spite of himself, he smiled a little. Despite all that's been going on, he saw a small sliver of light on the horizon.

He turned and walked back to the Cortex. Once he arrived, Cisco saw Harry talking quietly with the other members of the team. No one seemed to notice his entrance.

"What's up?" he asked.

"Cisco," Iris said in surprise, turning to face him, "How did it go with Caitlin?"

"It went well, I think. I have a feeling she might come back to us," he said.

There was a collective sigh of relief and expressions of joy amongst the team.

"So, she agreed to talk the cure?" Julian asked hopefully.  
  


"She's going to think about it," Cisco admitted. "But I really think I got through to her."

Many in the group nodded, all trying to take in this new information. It was a small victory – but a victory nonetheless. Caitlin was a core member of their team, and her absence was felt profoundly. The prospect of having her back was a heartwarming one for them all.

Cisco made to change the subject. "So, as far as our other _guest_ is concerned, what have we decided?"

"Well, you'll be happy to know that Tracy has agreed to help," Harry said.

Cisco nodded. "Well, that's something."

"Speaking of which," Barry said, "Savitar's on borrowed time; we need to start figuring this out."

"Tonight?" Wally whined. "Look, bro, I know this is important and all, but some of us have classes in the morning."

Joe gave Barry a pat on the shoulder. "It's been a long day, Bar. Maybe it would be best if everyone went home and got some rest before trying to defy the laws of physics."

Barry let out a tired sigh, nodding. "Yeah, you're probably right, Joe."

"What about Savitar? We can't leave him here all night without supervision," Julian said.

Barry looked around at his friends before shrugging. "I guess I'll stay and pull a graveyard shift. Keep an eye on him."

"Well, if you're staying, I'll stay, too," Cisco offered. "That way we can take turns staying up."

Normally Barry would've tried to argue, to insist that he could handle it alone. However, it had been a long night. He was tired – physically and emotionally – and now wasn't the time to play the hero. Literally. So, instead, he smiled gratefully and said, "Thanks, Cisco."

"Alright, well, be safe – _both_ of you," Joe said, giving the heroes his fatherly, no-nonsense look. 

Cisco smirked. "Come on, Joe. How much trouble could we possibly get into?"

"I'm serious, you two. Savitar may have backed down for now, but he's still a threat – not to mention unpredictable. _Do not_ lower your defenses." More softly, Joe added, "We already lost one person tonight. I'm not losing anyone else."

Barry nodded solemnly. "We'll stay alert, Joe. We promise." Cisco simply nodded his consent.

"Alright, well, I guess I'll see you guys in the morning," Iris said, looking sadly at Barry.

After all this time wondering if she would live to see their wedding day, Iris never wanted to leave Barry's side again. They won tonight. They stopped Savitar. Yet, there was still this fear within her that Barry would be ripped away from her. The last thing she wanted was to leave him – and for the entire night, no less.

As if Barry could read her mind, he pulled her in for a comforting hug. Iris immediately wrapped her arms around him, burrowing her head into the crock of his neck. Barry rubbed her back soothingly and murmured into her hair, "Don't worry, Iris. We'll be fine. No one's gonna take you away from me anymore."

He felt her nod against his chest. They lingered in each other's embrace for a minute more before breaking apart.

Despite Barry's assurances, Iris was still inclined to ask, "Maybe I should stay, too? You guys might need the extra help."

Barry gave her a fond smile but shook his head. "We've got it covered. You should go home and get some rest."

Iris nodded resignedly, trying her best to return Barry's smile. Though she doubted sleep would come easily, if at all. She reached up to give her fiancé a peck on the cheek before leaving with Joe. Once the rest of the team said their goodbyes as well, Cisco and Barry were left alone in the Cortex.

Barry then turned to Cisco. "I better show Savitar to one of the spare rooms."

Cisco nodded, dropping into one of the desk chairs.

Barry made his way into the Med Bay and found Savitar sitting in the same chair he was in half an hour ago. He knocked on the doorframe. Savitar looked up.

"We're shutting down for the night, so... you can take one of the spare rooms. If you're tired."

"Oh, sure. There's a huge threat of, you know, disappearing from existence hanging over my head, but I'll try to _sleep_."

Barry sighed. "Do you want the room or not?"

Savitar blinked once, twice, then rolled his eyes and stood. Barry assumed that, despite what he said, Savitar must've been tired. Otherwise, he would've fought much harder to think of a comeback. Barry didn't dwell on it, instead leading the way to Savitar's room.

The walk down to the lower floor was about as awkward as one could imagine. There were two versions of Barry – one selfless and heroic, the other broken and twisted – walking side-by-side. They were the same and yet different; familiar and yet strangers. After everything that had transpired today, it didn't seem like there were any words to be said. At this point, Barry didn't think Savitar was worthy of a conversation. Too much had happened. Too much _would've_ happened.

When they finally reached Savitar's room, Barry stopped in the open doorway. Savitar stopped, as well.

"Here we are," Barry said gesturing into the room.

Savitar took a peek inside. "Wow, look at that. I have a bed and everything. Wouldn't you rather throw me in the Pipeline?" he asked dryly.

"I might," Barry said seriously. "Look, Savitar, you're a guest here. And we _will_ do everything we can to help you. But if you step out of line-"

Savitar sighed in annoyance. "You don't need to read me my rights, Barry. This isn't my first time being 'The Broken Time Remnant'."

"Hey, I never said that."

"Yes, you did," he said simply. "Six years from now."

Savitar stepped into the room, looking around in more detail.

Barry stood there a minute, waiting to see if Savitar was going to request anything additional. It seemed too friendly, too cordial to offer him anything other than a bed. Ultimately, they'd won today. Iris was safe, and Cisco had gotten through to Caitlin. However, they still lost a teammate. H.R. was gone, and this was no time to be courteous to the man who killed him. 

When it was obvious that Savitar wasn't going to speak anymore, Barry turned to leave. "Sleep well," he said, more out of social convention than sincerity.

Savitar didn't respond, but Barry wouldn't have heard anyway. He shuffled to the far end of the room to lay down on his bed. Hours ago, he was the God of Speed. Now, he was just Barry Allen's time remnant, alone in a dark room.

It wasn't anything he wasn't used to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, just an FYI, that scene between Killer Frost and Cisco at the beginning isn't mine. The dialogue is copied verbatim from a deleted scene I saw from 3x23. I thought it was a good way to start my story. If you're curious, you should try to find it. The scene itself sheds light on a lot of things - at least I think so.


	2. Cure Me, Cure Me Not

"We could always just wait and see what happens. Who knows – maybe he'll pull-a-Thawne and inexplicably stay alive?"

"So that's your plan? Wait around and see whether or not he disappears from existence?"

"You got a better one?"

"Yes – anything but that."

The current scene was a very familiar one for Team Flash. Everyone was gathered around the desk in the Cortex, brainstorming about how to help Savitar. It had been a long, sleepless night for many of them, as H.R.’s death still stung profoundly in their hearts. But, of course, they could never have just one problem. So, the team decided to push aside their grief for now and focus on the most imminent issue – keeping Barry’s reckless time remnant from disappearing.

“Alright, you know what, it’s hard being the genius tech wiz with brilliant ideas 24/7. And, may I remind you, _Iris_ , that I was awake on and off all night babysitting Frankenstein’s monster. This brain-” Cisco pointed to his forehead, “-won’t be working at full capacity until I get some Jitters in my system.”

Iris was going to retort but thought better of it. Coffee did sound good right now. Turning to address her fiancé, she said, “Babe, I think that’s your queue.”

“Alright, fine. But I expect there to be work happening while I’m gone.”

Cisco waved him off with a hand. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, man. You do your job; we’ll do ours.”

With an eyeroll and a gust of wind, Barry was gone.

“If I may,” Harry piped up, “Perhaps it would be best to review what we _do_ know and search for a solution in that.”

Iris nodded. “That’s a good idea, Harry.”

“It’s what I’m here for.”

“Alright, let’s give it a try.” Cisco grabbed the white marker off the table and made his way to the clear board. He started the way every timeline visualization does – with a line. Cisco then added some dots at various points across the line. “So, here’s the deal. This whole chicken-or-the-egg fiasco started when Iris died.” He drew an arch from one dot to another. “That Barry becomes distraught and isolated. In the future, when fighting Savitar, he creates time remnants. Savitar lets one of them live. After he’s trapped in the Speedforce, the remnant goes crazy, travels through time, creates this myth for himself, and plots to kill Iris. Then the cycle repeats.”

Cisco looks back at the group. “Everybody with me so far?” Once he receives affirmation from everyone, he continues, “Good, ‘cuz this is where things get complicated. Because we were able to prevent Iris’ death yesterday – go team! – the cycle broke. So, now, the events that created Savitar never actually happened. Since the time remnant didn’t immediately go off his rocker, the change in timeline hasn’t quite caught up to him yet. But time _is_ rewriting itself, and soon, it’ll drag Savitar under.”

Joe looked like a deer caught in the headlights, before shaking the expression off his face. “That makes no more sense to me than it did the first time. What about the scientists in the room? Anyone have a breakthrough?”

A hand at the back of the room rose up, along with a voice. “I do have one note.”

Savitar’s arrival caught them all off guard. He had entered so quietly. It was a wonder that someone so hateful and destructive could sneak into a crowded room without notice. Everyone’s reaction was different. Joe was suspicious and still quite angry. He hadn’t fought Barry about helping Savitar; that’s what they did here, after all – helped people. However, that didn’t mean all was forgiven. Under 12 hours ago, this man tried to take his daughter away from him. He’d succeeded in killing H.R. Threating his family was the quickest way to make an enemy of Joe West. He wasn’t sure what Savitar’s future held, but he doubted that he’d ever feel comfortable with him being around.

Iris, oddly enough, looked rather guilty. Savitar had mentioned in passing about being easily ignored in the past ( _future?_ ), and here they were doing it to him again. Another part of her was skeptical, though. Since arriving, he seemed to mellow out somewhat, but Iris couldn’t help the fear she felt in his presence. She’d tried so hard to be strong and brave these past few months. However, when she finally came face-to-face with the ominous figure who wanted to take her life, she was _terrified_. Perhaps not so much for herself. No, Iris was more afraid of what this meant for Barry. She knew he experienced trauma; she knew he carried pain. But to see what that could do to him, to see how destroyed Savitar was because of all that hate – it broke her heart. Savitar wore the face of the man she loved, and he also had Barry’s memories. Yet, he felt like a stranger to her. And perhaps what uneased her the most was that she wasn’t sure how Savitar viewed her. Was she a stranger to him, as well? Was she a distant memory? If so, was she a good memory or a bad one? She thought the answer would be obvious, given that he’d tried to kill her. But, as Iris was discovering, nothing about Savitar was obvious.

Cisco, on the other hand, was not confused at all about Savitar. The expression on his face was more irritated than anything. He’d made his feelings clear from the beginning. After all, as fun as it was to be kidnapped and held hostage for his technological expertise ( _it wasn’t_ ), yesterday was one kidnapping too many. He would go along with helping him – for Barry’s sake – but that was all. Afterwards, he was content to tell Savitar _good riddance_ and kick him out the door. Well, perhaps they wouldn’t be able to do exactly that. Savitar was a _very recently_ reformed – and “reformed” was putting it generously – villain, after all. Cisco doubted they’d be able to help him, then turn around and release him back into the wild. As much as he’d love for Savitar to be someone else’s problem, this was their burden to bear.

The one remaining occupant in the room was Harry, who didn’t look pleased at all. He hadn’t been on this earth long enough to develop a personal hatred for Savitar, but it was obvious he wasn’t “on their side”, as it were. Then again, Harry didn’t like anybody.

Savitar noticed the startled looks on their faces, and he smirked in amusement. “Yeah, I’m still here. And for the record, I did not ‘go crazy.’”

“Oh, you’re right, my apologies,” Cisco feigned remorse, touching his hand to his chest, “Would you prefer ‘clinically insane?’”

“Go ahead – make jokes. But you don’t know even half the story.”

“I’ll tell you what I know! I know that you’re on _very_ thin ice here,” Joe jumped in, face hard, “And if you so much as _think_ about jumping out of line, we can all just sit back and let time do its work. You deserve a lot worse for what you put my family through.”

Iris put a gentle hand on her dad’s shoulder. “Dad, it’s alright. Nothing will be solved through fighting. That’s already been done. If everyone stays peaceable, we can get through this.”

“I don’t know, Iris. _Pops_ here seems a little trigger-happy to me.”

Joe was about to lunge at Savitar when Barry returned, speeding to a stop right between them. “Woah, woah, hey! What’s going on?”

“Nothing, Babe. Dad and I were just gonna take a walk outside, get some fresh air.” Iris turned to her father, giving him a knowing look. “Right, Dad?”

He gave Savitar a long, threatening look before responding. “That’s probably for the best, before I scar the other side of his face.”

Iris gave her dad a pat on the arm before leading him out of the Cortex.

Once they were out of earshot, Barry turned to Savitar for an explanation. He didn’t even try to hide his exasperation. “What did you do?”

“I merely made an observation. Seems that this team of yours doesn’t take too kindly to the truth.”

“Well, I wasn’t here, but I’ve known Joe my whole life. He doesn’t just develop that hostility out of nowhere. So, whatever you said or did to piss him off, it needs to stop.”

“Ah yes, of course – everything is always _my_ fault. Heaven forbid that anything disrupts this perfect little image that you’ve all developed!”

“Well maybe we’d be able to give you the benefit of the doubt if you weren’t, you know, _you_ ,” Cisco interjected.

“Savitar, this is exactly what I was talking about last night. You can’t go around provoking people like that. If it continues, I will make good on my promise to throw you in the Pipeline.”

“Let me know when you do; I’d love to watch that.”

The attention in the room once again turned to the doorway. Cisco sighed. “Seriously, Frost? Do _any_ of you metahuman criminals knock?”

Frost gave a wry smile. “I’m not interrupting anything, am I?”

Barry gave Savitar a pointed look, daring him to act out again. Savitar’s demeanor remained defiant, but his next words were compliant. “No. In fact, I was just leaving.”

Savitar made his way out of the Cortex. He slowly to a stop beside Frost, who gave him cocky glare. The two remained in this silent standoff for a few tense moments before Savitar brushed past her.

With Savitar gone, the ice in her veins started to melt again. Frost turned her attention back to Team Flash. “I’ll take the cure.”

She was met with stunned silence. The shock came from more than just her consent, which in and of itself seems uncharacteristic and hasty. It was also the fact that Frost just… _announced it_ , without any preamble. Caitlin was never that blunt. She was generally very tactful, and if there was something difficult to be said, she would preface it with gentle words. Frost had no time to tickle anyone’s ears. When she had something to say, she said it. Even now, when this was to be considered good news, the abruptness of it was startling.

Cisco was the first to snap out of the shock. “I’m sorry; come again? You’ll take it?”

“That’s what I said.”

“It hasn’t even been a full day. With the way we left things, I just thought you’d take more time to think.”

Frost shrugged. “Thinking was Caitlin’s thing. I’m more impulsive, if you hadn’t noticed.”

“We noticed,” Barry said. He gave her a small smile. “Whatever the reason, I’m glad you decided this.”

The sentiment was echoed by the rest of the team. Frost cleared her throat. “Yeah, well, let’s get this over with before anyone gets too sappy.”

No one tried to argue with her, lest she change her mind. Harry was the one to go fetch Julian. It was a few quiet minutes before the CSI’s rushed footsteps could be heard. He ran into the Cortex slightly flushed and out of breath.

“Caitlin!”

“How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?”

“Right – my apologies. I’m just so happy to here you’ll take the cure! Your mother and I worked on it together, so I can assure you it’s completely safe.”

“So I’ve heard. What’s the holdup, then?”

Julian was a bit flustered by her brusqueness, but he recovered quickly. “Yes, of course.” He pulled the vial out of his pocket and handed it to Frost. “Now just let me get-”

Before Julian could finish, Frost popped out the cork and swallowed the serum in one huge gulp. She cringed as the liquid’s surprisingly metallic taste ran down her throat. Team Flash cringed in unison with her.

“-the syringe,” Julian finished anxiously. “That was meant to be injected – not ingested.”

“Caitlin had the patience to follow procedure; I don’t. So, what happens now? I don’t feel any different.”

Julian swallowed nervously. “Yes, well, that’s the one thing we weren’t able to determine – how long until it takes effect.”

“What am I supposed to do, then?” Frost questioned angrily. “You expect me to just sit around and wait for Caitlin to reappear?”

Everyone turned to Cisco. He was the one to convince Frost to take the cure; plus, he and Caitlin had the longest relationship of anyone here. Because of that, the team assumed Cisco would have the ultimate say-so on Killer-Frost-related things. Too bad no one decided to clue him in on this before now.

Cisco looked around the room, realizing that everyone expected _him_ to take the lead here. He shrunk sheepishly under their gazes. “Honestly, I hadn’t thought that far ahead. I was doubtful that she’d even take the cure; I didn’t plan out what would happen next.” Cisco noticed the irritated look on Frost’s face. If he didn’t come up with something to appease her, he feared that she’d turn around and walk out of their lives again. “ _However_ , now that I’m thinking about it, I believe it would be best for her to return regularly for check-ups. We should monitor her frequently, especially since we don’t know when or _how_ the cure will even work.”

Barry nodded. “I agree. In fact, you could just stay at STAR Labs, if you want.”

“Cisco offered the same thing, but the answer’s still ‘no’. I don’t think it’s best for Savitar and I to inhabit the same space right now.”

“You’ll at least come a few days a week, though, right? Cisco made a good point; we really should keep a close eye on you for a while,” Julian said.

Frost rolled her eyes. “ _Yes_. I’ll let you guys play doctor. Just don’t read more into this than what it is. I’m coming in for check-ups – and check-ups only.”

“Deal,” Barry agreed.


	3. Rebel Without a Cause

“Attending the opera?”

“Hmm?”

Frost gestured to Cisco’s prim black suit, eyebrow quirked.

Cisco glanced down at himself, almost self-consciously, then returned to checking her blood pressure. “Oh. No. We’re heading straight to H.R.’s funeral after I finish up here.”

Frost had the decency to mellow at his words. “Ah, I see.”

The Med Bay descended into awkward silence. Sometimes, if he weren’t paying too much attention, Cisco would think he was standing across from Caitlin, sharing fond memories of times long past. Then he’d get a reminder of the last few months – who she had become and what she had done. He wanted so desperately to forgive and forget, to trust that the cure would work and that they could move forward. So much had happened, though. Even if Caitlin returned, H.R.’s death would always be a grim reminder of what she’d once been capable of doing. Cisco was still struggling to rectify the knowledge he had of Killer Frost with the good person he knew Caitlin to be. The cuts would heal, but the scars would remain.

Cisco looked at her thoughtfully, wagering the consequences of asking his question. He decided it was worth the risk. “You know, you can come with us. If you want.”

“I’m not sure I’d be welcome.”

“Sure, you would. In fact, I think it would mean a lot to the team. I can ask Barry-”

“Cisco. It’s not happening.” Upon seeing his face fall, Frost felt the odd compulsion to change her wording. “I’m not there yet. Maybe one day – but not now.”

He nodded diminutively. “Alright. I can accept that.”

Just as he finished taking a blood sample, Barry came speeding into the Med Bay. “All done here, Cisco? Everyone’s ready to head out.”

“I’m almost finished. Just let me put this sample away.”

Barry nodded as Cisco wandered over to the medical cabinet. He glanced at Caitlin, made a face as if he’d just remembered she was there, and hurriedly covered it with a smile. “How are you feeling?”

“Same as when you asked 15 minutes ago.”

“Right – sorry – I just want to make sure. We have no idea the possible side effects of the cure.”

“Well, I can in today like you asked, didn’t I?”

“You did, and I appreciate it.”

Killer Frost hopped off the exam table and made to leave. Barry blocked her pathway before she could.

Frost raised an eyebrow. “Problem?”

“Yeah. No! Well, uh… I have a favor to ask.”

She snorted. “You’re asking _me_ for a favor? What, was the rest of humanity unavailable?”

“Ha ha ha. Just hear me out.” When she crossed her arms and gave him a bored look, Barry knew he had her attention. “So, the whole team is going to H.R.’s funeral-”

“If this is another invitation, I already told Cisco-”

“No, that’s not what this is about. I was going to say that since we’ll be gone for at least an hour, Savitar will be here alone. Unsupervised. And no one is comfortable with that idea.”

“Nor should they be. What’s this have to do with me?”

Barry swallowed hard. “I need you to stay behind and keep an eye on Savitar – just while we’re gone.”

“You’re joking, right?”

“No.”

“If not joking then what – crazy, desperate, delusional?”

“No, yes, and no.”

“I’m not playing babysitter.”

“Please, Cait-” Barry saw her objection coming almost immediately, so he amended, “ _Frost_. There’s no one else we can ask. You know Savitar, you know STAR Labs, and you have the powers necessary to restrain him if things go wrong.”

“What makes you think you can trust me?”

Barry gave her a small grin. “Because I have no other choice. You’re our only option.”

“Ah, yes, the patented Barry Allen Hope. Hasn’t that gotten you in enough trouble already?”

“I’m willing to take my chances.”

“What’s in it for me?”

“You can never just say yes to something, can you?” Frost just gave him a smug look. “Well, what is it that you want?”

“A girl could always use a little spending money.”

“Seriously?”

Frost shrugged. “I’m between jobs right now, and my last business venture… fell through the cracks, shall we say?”

Barry sighed. “Alright, fine. I’ll pay you.”

“In that case, I accept. If you’d led with that, this conversation would’ve been a lot shorter.”

“I’ll remember that next time.”

Frost pushed past him into the Cortex, throwing over her shoulder, “There better not be a ‘next time’.”

A minute later, Cisco and Barry followed behind her. Barry turned to address Frost. “So, just to be clear: all I’m asking is that you keep up with Savitar’s location and check every so often to make sure he’s not wreaking havoc. If there’s an emergency, you can call us. Only use your powers when _absolutely necessary_.”

She scoffed. “Way to take the fun out of it.”

Barry fixed her with a serious look, but he could only maintain it for a second. “Alright, we’re going. Thanks for doing this.”

Frost hummed distractedly in response. Once Barry and Cisco took their leave, she had the Cortex to herself. Unsure what to do, Frost alternated between reading magazines, filing her nails, and raiding the mini fridge for something to snack on. She tried as hard as possible to distance herself emotionally from this place, from the memories associated with this building. Caitlin had endured a lot of changes – good and bad – within these walls. There was a spark of sentimentality trying to claw its way through her chest, but Frost shoved it down. She loathed the thought of falling prey to the warm feeling that Team Flash elicited for Caitlin. She wasn’t Caitlin. And this team wasn’t _her_ team.

In all honesty, Frost questioned every second that she spent lingering here. She could’ve been far away by now, using force to obtain whatever she wanted and getting civilians to cower before her. The thought lost all appeal almost as soon as it entered her mind. It just didn’t seem worth it – to be powerful but alone. Perhaps these powers weren’t her curse, after all. Perhaps her true curse was this incessant need to be a part of something. Caitlin had yearned for companionship, and so did Frost. Pathetic. She felt sick when she realized that she had crawled back to the very people that had rejected her. Then again, Savitar had been alone and powerful for decades, and look where that got him. He came crawling back to Team Flash just like her. Except, he was bitter and depressed. Frost certainly didn’t want to end up like that. She wasn’t Team Flash’s biggest fan, but she outright despised Savitar right now. Maybe she would continue to stick around, just to spite him.

Frost turned her attention back to the tv. Having finally settled on watching _Doctorial Pursuit_ (which had nothing to do with the fact that it was Caitlin’s favorite show, _thank you very much_ ), she enjoyed a few minutes of peace. Which were promptly ruined by Savitar’s entrance. 

He did a double take as he entered. “You’re still here?”

“You’re still alive?” she shot back with false innocence.

He gave her a look. “Glad we got the pleasantries out of the way. Seriously, what are you doing?”

Frost shrugged. “STAR Labs has cable. I don’t.” Savitar scoffed, moving to rummage through the mini fridge much like she had. Frost smirked, seeing an opportunity to frustrate him. “Also, I’ve been tasked with keeping an eye on you while everyone else is gone.”

The mini fridge door slammed shut. “ _What?_ ”

“Well, you didn’t think they’d trust you to be here alone, did you? Funny that given the choice between two supervillains they still saw me as more responsible.”

“I don’t need a babysitter.”

“And I don’t want to babysit you, but Barry seemed to think otherwise.”

“So, what, you gonna throw me in the Pipeline if I get on your nerves?”

“You always get on my nerves. I’m only here to make some easy money and ensure you stay on your best behavior.”

“What makes them think they can tell _you_ to try and keep tabs on _me_?”

Frost barely gave him a sideways glance. “I don’t know what to tell you. If it’s any consolation, I honestly don’t care what you do as long as you stay out of my way.”

Savitar continued, as if he hadn’t heard her. “If Barry thinks he’s gonna control me again, he’s wrong. In fact-”

Savitar dashed out of the Cortex. As soon as he left the building, an obnoxious beeping sound emitted from one of the screens. Frost glanced over at the console, seeing the readout of Savitar’s location and vitals. (When had they put a tracker on him?) The blue dot labeled “Savitar” was shown zipping around the city, back and forth. He was making a show of it, trying to prove that he was still free as a bird.

Frost rolled her eyes. She better be compensated well for this. The tracker appeared to have communication functions, so she held down a button and started speaking. “Enjoying your temper tantrum?”

“ _Frost? What the- oh. Tracker. Very clever._ ”

“What exactly do you hope to accomplish?”

“ _I thought you didn’t care what I did_.”

“I don’t. But I refuse to get an earful from Barry because you decided to be rebellious.”

“ _Oh, I’m sorry; am I getting in the way of you becoming the teacher’s pet?_ ”

“You’re breaking up, Savitar. Did you say you were a pest?”

Instead of responding, Savitar disabled the comm link. Frost leaned back in her chair with a huff. This almost felt nostalgic – her berating him for his stupidity as he ran around the city. Unlike Caitlin, however, she didn’t care what happened to him. _She didn’t._ Within five minutes, however, Savitar was running back into the Cortex. Frost made a point not to look back at him.

“You’re such a child, do you know that?” Instead of a comeback, all she got was the sound of his heavy panting. She scoffed. “That’s just sad. Instead of proving how independent you are, all you proved is that you get winded way too easily. How quickly the mighty have fallen.”

Frost still didn’t manage to provoke a response. It was just more panting – rather aggressively, she might add. The doctor’s voice in the back of her head squeaked out a concern, but she pushed it away. Frost meant what she said. She didn’t care what happened to him. For a while, she just decided to ignore his presence altogether. Her focus was entirely on the television. Until a loud thump rippled through the Cortex and she was finally persuaded to turn around. Savitar lay slumped against the wall, unmoving and clammy.

Frost wasn’t impressed. “Oh, now what are you doing? So desperate for attention that you decided to play dead?”

Still, she got no response. After a few tense seconds of silence, Frost got up and approached Savitar. She jabbed his side lightly with the heel of her boots, then a little harder when he didn’t react. Nothing. Not even a flinch. A flushed sort of worry began to fill her. Not even Savitar would commit to something this long. For the first time since he stormed out, she considered that he might not actually be okay. Frost kneeled next to him and shook his shoulder.

“Alright Savitar, this wasn’t funny to begin with and it certainly isn’t funny now.” She shook him more and more, harder and harder. “Savitar!”

The warm concern turned into a cold panic. Doctor mode activated, she immediately checked his pulse. Weak – especially for a speedster. His skin was flushed and sweaty, his breathing shallow. Frost was now absolutely certain this wasn’t a game. He needed help – and quick.

“…What have you done this time?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the kudos and comments so far; they get me inspired to keep writing!


	4. The Good Doctor

_“Frost, we got an alert from- What did you do?!”_

_“Why do you assume I did this? …Well, I didn’t!_ He _was being an idiot.”_

~

_“Don’t just stand there; help me get him into the MedBay!”_

~

_“What’s wrong with him?”_

_“How long do you have?”_

~

_“I better get paid extra for this…”_

* * *

Voices and sounds faded in and out of his mind. Then, like forcing one’s head up above bobbing waves, Savitar came back to full consciousness. His eyes peeled open slowly, taking a moment to adjust to the bright lights of… (Where was he?)

"Why is it that I always end up patching you up? You'd think that you might return the favor once in a while – or stop doing stupid things, at the very least."

Startled, Savitar looked to the side to see Frost standing over him with a chart. He scrunched his eyebrows. Pieces of the puzzle then started falling into place. The soft surface under him was a bed, and he was in the MedBay. Savitar would never admit it out loud, but the sight of Frost watching over him as soon as he woke was more comforting than he’d like. Regardless of what may have happened in the time he was unconscious, knowing Caitlin was there chased away all his fears. At least, it used to – back when he had been Barry.

With that thought, Savitar smirked up at her. “Is this sentiment, Dr. Snow?"

She jammed a needle into his arm with more force than necessary, deriving pleasure from his subsequent wince. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’m just here for the money.”

His smirk remained nonetheless, until questions began filling his mind. “What happened?”

“You passed out.”

Savitar raised an eyebrow. It was the closest he ever came to showing fear. He immediately tried to sit up but felt some resistance near his hands. Savitar looked down to discover that his wrists were bound to the bed with meta-dampening cuffs. This time, some fear did manage to show on his face.

He jerked aggressively, trying to break the restraints. “What is this?!”

Frost pushed him back down with a firm (and rather painful) hand on his chest. “Trust me; you wouldn’t be able to go anywhere even if you weren’t restrained.”

“Frost, you better tell me what’s going on right now or-”

“Or what? You’ll glare me to death?”

Fortunately, Barry and Cisco, who had been alerted by all the commotion, jogged in before things got any worse. Barry was the first to speak. “Woah, guys, settle down. No need for a fight.”

“There’s always need for a fight,” Savitar rebutted, staring pointedly at Frost.

“Ooooh. Brave words coming from the only one in the room restrained and without powers,” she threw back.

“Alright, enough!” Cisco interjected. “You’re supposed to be keeping him alive, not threatening his life.”

“I’m a multitasker.”

“Well, take a break, Frost. Cisco and I can handle him for a while.”

Frost made a show of rolling her eyes and turning away dramatically. “Be my guest. I need a drink.”

“You’re still on the job, you know!” Cisco called after her. She kept walking, letting out a noncommittal acknowledgement.

Once she was gone, Barry wasted no time with preamble. “Savitar, what were you thinking?”

“You’ll have to be more specific.”

“You know what I’m talking about. What was the point of that little run you went on?”

“I’m not your _dog_ , Barry. You can’t keep me on a leash.”

Barry tapped the cuffs pointedly. “Actually, it looks like we can. And even if we couldn’t, what did this act of rebellion accomplish?” Savitar scowled and was about to throw out an insult, but his past self interrupted. “I’ll tell you what it accomplished. Thanks to that stunt, we know have even less time to figure out how to keep you alive.”

This stopped whatever retort Savitar was concocting and sent it back down his throat. He stared suspiciously (or perhaps apprehensively.) “What do you mean?”

Cisco took this as his cue to enter the conversation, as much as he was enjoying watching two versions of Barry argue back and forth. “We ran some tests and it seems the more you use your powers, the faster you die. Hence the dampeners.”

“Fix it, then!” Savitar growled.

“Hey, calm down, Incredible Hulk! We’re trying.”  
  


“Try harder.”

“Or we could not try _at all_.”

Barry threw his hands up. “Alright, enough. Savitar, one more word out of you and you’ll be recovering in the Pipeline.”

“You think that’s a threat? I spent an eternity in _your_ Speedforce prison; the Pipeline is _nothing_ compared to that. So, do your worst, because I guarantee I’ve been bound with heavier chains.”

“Or,” said Iris, stepping into the MedBay, “We could stop trading insults and do something productive with our time.”

The sight of his fiancé, ever level-headed and wise, disarmed Barry. Cisco followed suit, looking something akin to embarrassed. With brief instructions for Savitar to get rest (and keep his mouth shut), they followed the CCPD reporter back into the Cortex. Harry was waiting for them.

“Sounds like you’ve got yourselves a real fiery patient in there,” he said in lieu of a greeting. 

“Don’t even get me started.”

“Well, while you were off dealing with Savitar, I got to thinking: what if there was another event in time that could lead to Savitar’s creation?”

“In place of Iris’ death?” Barry asked.

“Exactly.”

Iris hummed skeptically. “I don’t know. If there had been an easier way to survive, I think Savitar would have chosen it. He made it very clear that killing me was _the only way_.”

“We don’t know that for sure, Iris. He may look like me, but he’s proven to be ruthless. We shouldn’t give him too much credit.”

“Maybe. But there’s still a part of you in him. Since I know you would never hurt me, it’s reasonable to think that Savitar would only hurt me if there was no alternative.”

“Alternative or no alternative, we don’t have the time to track down another event that might replace Iris’ death,” Cisco said. “Swiss cheese face over there is on borrowed time.”

“Well, that’s our only plan. What’s the alternative? As long as Savitar is alive and we do nothing, the timeline _will_ catch up with him,” Harry relented.

"You can't hide from time,” Barry agreed with a sigh.

Cisco's head shot up, his eyes twinkling with a new idea. "But what if you could?" His three teammates fixed him with confused looks. Cisco stood from his chair and began to pace. “If there was a way we could trick time into thinking that Savitar _wasn’t_ alive – at least not in this world – it wouldn’t come after him!”

“And how exactly would we _trick time_?” Iris asked.

“I might have an idea. Harry, follow me. I need to find Tracy and run this by her.”

* * *

Frost rummaged through the fridge in STAR Labs’ employee lounge. She needed something strong enough to dull her irritation with Savitar, but it was becoming clear that such a substance didn’t exist. She settled on Dr. Pepper (perhaps the sugar would do her some good) and turned to leave. As she was walking out, Julian was walking in. He nearly ran into her but managed to back up in time.

“Cait! Sorry, I didn’t see you there.”

“Clearly.”

Frost tried to walk around him, but he took a step back, blocking her path. “Wait! I just wanted to say… sorry.”

“You already did.”

“Oh, no, I wasn’t talking about just now. I-” Julian’s words came to a grinding halt as he stared at a spot on Frost’s head.

She cocked an eyebrow. “What are you staring at?”

“Your hair, it- a strand of it has started turning brown. Look.”

Julian pointed to it, and Frost grabbed the hair to see for herself. It was indeed being to regain a brunette pigment. Something hard and unsteady settled in the pit of her stomach. It was working. The cure was – albeit slowly – working. A part of her never believed it would. This almost felt like a dream. The reality that the life she’d been living for the past several months – the _person_ she’d been for the past several months – was being painted over…. She didn’t know how to feel. Should she be happy? After doing the things she did, not many people would’ve gotten a second chance. She had. Frost had the opportunity to leave all that behind and begin again. Was that the right move, though? Maybe she didn’t deserve to start fresh. Maybe she didn’t _want_ to. What if she liked aspects of the person she’d become? After all that had happened, it just didn’t seem like something she could erase.

Frost shook her head, banishing the self-conscious thoughts. Now wasn’t the time. She looked back at Julian. “I guess you should be proud, then. It works.”

“Well, it was a team effort. Your mother was a tremendous help.”

The mention of her mother made Frost want to leave even more. She tried once again to walk away, but Julian grabbed hold of her arm. The hand quickly retreated when her irises flared an icy blue in warning.

“Caitlin, please. I don’t mean to be a bother-”

“Really? I couldn’t tell.”

“I just have something I really need to say to you. Please, just let me get it off my chest.” Frost sighed and crossed her arms. Julian took that as a cue to continue. “I’m sorry if I came off a bit intense earlier. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I just- I really missed you, Cait. When Killer Frost took over, I was so afraid of something bad happening to you. But, being at H.R.’s funeral today remined me how delicate life is. I don’t want to wait until another catastrophe occurs for me to get my courage. So, all that’s to say… I’d love to get a cup of coffee sometime.”

Frost blinked – and blinked again. _Coffee?_ “I’m sorry; there must be some mistake. You seem to be under the impression that we’re _friends_ or something.”

“I certainly hope so. But you know I want to be more than that, Caitlin. I’ve made my feelings clear.”

“Yes, and somehow my constant rejection hasn’t swayed you. Get this through your head, Julian: you mean nothing to me.”

She started to walk away again, but he took a step forward, imploring her to look at him. “Who’s saying that – Caitlin or Killer Frost? Because the Caitlin I knew valued our friendship.” When she didn’t respond, he continued, “Caitlin, I lo-”

"No, Julian! No. You need to stop with that. Do not stand there and tell me that you love Caitlin. She had one rule; she asked only one thing of you – a dying wish, if you will. 'Don't remove the necklace.'"

Julian furrowed his brows, surprised at the turn of the conversation. He hadn’t expected her to go back to _that_. "I- Y-you _were_ dying! I had to do something; I-I couldn't just let it happen. I was trying to help you!"

"Sure, you sound chivalrous, but that's not the truth. The truth is that Caitlin made herself clear: she would've rather died than become me. You couldn't accept that, though, could you? You didn't agree with it, so you decided to ignore it. And yes, you got what you wanted: Caitlin lived. But what about what Caitlin wanted? I ended up taking over and trying to _destroy_ all her friends. I _teamed up_ with Barry's nut-job time remnant. But it's all good because you saved a life, right? Wrong. You sacrificed her desires for your own. You put your feelings above Caitlin's because you were too afraid to lose her. So don't you _dare_ claim that you loved her."

Julian stood there, eyes wide, lips parted, in shock.

Frost took a deep breath, steadying herself. “So. There won’t be any getting of coffee or dinner or _anything_. This – _we_ – aren’t happening. Just do yourself a favor and stay out of my way. I won’t tell you again.”

This time, she was able to walk out, leaving a stunned Julian in her wake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, like the tag says... not Julian friendly. I just felt that what he did was never properly addressed. So, here we are.


End file.
